Signature Strength: Wisdom

Posted By Maryann Porosky On OCTOBER 02,2018

Each of us has strengths . . . and, well, areas that could use improvement. As a family caregiver, you may often feel inadequate. Or guilty. Or think that you aren't doing enough. Such negative self-assessments are common. A more balanced assessment would acknowledge that you also have qualities that shine.

Most of us believe that to be better people, we need to focus on our trouble spots. Over the next months, we will be drawing on the science of "positive psychology," which shows that cultivating what works is just as productive as scrutinizing the things that aren't working well. For example, each of us has characteristic "signature strengths." Wisdom may be one of yours.

Wisdom and knowledge
Are you the type of person others turn to when they need advice? If so, you probably have the strength of wisdom and knowledge:

Curiosity and a love of learning
Willingness to look at all sides
Ability to change your mind
A tendency to take time to reflect, look inward
An understanding of social dynamics
Empathy

Wisdom is more than being smart.
It's a special kind of intelligence that blends the heart and the brain. The more life experiences you have had—including losses—the more opportunities you have had to develop a wider perspective. The wise individual is able to listen to the heart but not be overcome by emotional extremes.

Using both sides of the brain
Wisdom is commonly associated with age. Brain studies reveal that older adults use both sides of their brain—the analytical side plus the more intuitive side— more equally than do younger adults. As one scientist put it, "they are in all-wheel drive."

Cultivate your wisdom.
Learning from the habits of wise individuals can help you foster this strength. Explore something unfamiliar. Try a new perspective. Pause and reflect. Strive to interpret the actions of others with kindness and compassion.

Would an outside perspective help?
Sometimes that wider perspective is most readily accessed by working with others outside the family system. As the northern New Jersey experts in family caregiving, we at Caring Choices can help you gain new insights and cultivate your own wisdom for the tasks ahead. Give us a call at 973-627-4087.